this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
