my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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