found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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