He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize