Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize