I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
