dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
