Duck Duck Cougar?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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