we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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