Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I wish there were birth control emojis
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
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