It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
