Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
