She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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