he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
