Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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