i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
