Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
