have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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