Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
