bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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