I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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