Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
