At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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