I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
