but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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