does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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