All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize