I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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