Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
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