my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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