ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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