Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
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