will power is for people who don't want to get laid
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
