at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize