i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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