Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i think i have two assholes
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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