So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize