Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.

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(937): View more from Ohio

We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve

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(210): View more from Texas

beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.

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(925): View more from California

This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in

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(218): View more from Minnesota

He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.

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