Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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