A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
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Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
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Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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