its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I think people are normalizing furries
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
