dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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