Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out