i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
