return my video game
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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