If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize