i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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