she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
