they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
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Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
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Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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