a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Your dad touched me again.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
